Happy Holidays! Count down the days until Christmas with these very funny kid’s Christmas jokes sent in by Boys’ Life readers. We guarantee this clean Christmas humor will help you “ho ho ho” like a certain jolly old elf.
Do you know a funny Christmas joke? Click here to send it to us.
Comic by Daryll Collins
Sean: Knock, knock.
Fawn: Who’s there?
Sean: Murray.
Fawn: Murray who?
Sean: Murray Christmas, one and all!
Joke submitted by Sean H., Farmington, N.M.
One night a Viking named Rudolph the Red was looking out the window when he said, “It’s going to rain.”
His wife asked, “How do you know?”
“Because Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear.”
Joke submitted by Jorgen R., Prunedale, Calif.
Caleb: What does Christmas have to do with a cat lost in the desert?
Ben: Beats me.
Caleb: They both have sandy claws.
Joke submitted by Joshua H., Seminole, Fla.
Comic by Scott Nickel
Will: What’s a good time for Santa to come down the chimney?
Bill: What?
Will: Anytime!
Joke submitted by Keith G., Forestdale, Mass.
Killian: Knock, knock.
Gary: Who’s there?
Killian: Pizza.
Gary: Pizza, who?
Killian: Pizza on earth, good will toward men!
Joke submitted by Killian L., Greensburg, Pa.
Noah: What is a bird’s favorite Christmas story?
Mike: I haven’t a clue.
Noah: The Finch Who Stole Christmas.
Joke submitted by Noah B., Port Deposit, Md.
Comic by Scott Nickel
Casen: What do you call a shark that delivers toys at Christmas?
Austin: I’m stumped.
Casen: “Santa Jaws!”
Joke submitted by Casen S., Tyler, Tex.
Will: Where do snowmen keep their money?
Bill: Beats me.
Will: In a snow bank.
Joke submitted by Will M., Big Canoe, Ga.
Sister: What are you giving Mom and Dad for Christmas?
Brother: A list of everything I want!
Joke submitted by Calvin L., Orlando, Fla.
Comic by Scott Nickel
Tim: Did you know Santa had only eight reindeer last Christmas?
Jim: Huh?
Tim: Comet stayed home to clean the sink.
Joke submitted by Tim S., Merriam, Kan.
Chris: What do snowmen like to do on the weekend?
Chrissy: What?
Chris: Chill out.
Joke submitted by Christopher H., Fair Oaks, Calif.
A book never written: “Joyful Occasions” by Holly Daze.
Joke submitted by Matthew H., Northridge, Calif.
Comic by Scott Nickel
Josh: What does Jack Frost like best about school?
John: What?
Josh: Snow and tell.
Joke submitted by Joshua S., Lafayette, Ind.
Zoey: What do you get if you cross an iPad with a Christmas tree?
Johnny: I don’t know. What?
Zoey: A pineapple!
Joke submitted by Zoey Y., Flower Mound, Tex.
A book never written: “How to Decorate a Tree” by Orna Ment.
Joke submitted by Justin L., Galena, Ohio
Comic by Scott Nickel
Moe: What are you going to give your little brother for Christmas this year?
Joe: I haven’t decided yet.
Moe: What did you give him last year?
Joe: The measles.
Joke submitted by Suzan L. W., Spring Hill, Fla.
Pedro: What has a jolly laugh, brings you presents and scratches up your furniture?
Ordep: Beats me. What?
Pedro: Santa Claws.
Joke submitted by Will M., Big Canoe, Ga.
Jacob: What do road crews use at the North Pole?
Jason: I don’t know.
Jacob: Snow cones!
Joke submitted by Ashwin B., Morris Plains, N.J.
Comic by Scott Nickel
Travis: Where do polar bears vote?
Anthony: Where?
Travis: The North Poll!
Joke submitted by Travis S., Alta Loma, Calif.
Teacher: Johnny, define claustrophobia.
Johnny: Fear of Santa Claus?
Joke submitted by Ronesha M., Allen, Tex.
Santa: Knock, knock.
Elf: Who’s there?
Santa: Olive.
Elf: Olive, who?
Santa: Olive the other reindeer.
Joke submitted by Joe R., Saint Charles, Mo.
Comic by Thomas Toons
Luke: What do elves do after school?
Jeffrey: I don’t know. What?
Luke: Their gnome work!
Joke submitted by Luke C., Somers, N.Y.
Joe: What nationality is Santa Claus?
Moe: What?
Joe: North Polish.
Joke submitted by Joe B., Huntersville, N.C.
Comic by Scott Nickel
Amanda: What’s the difference between Santa’s reindeer and a knight?
Robert: What?
Amanda: One slays the dragon, and the other’s draggin’ the sleigh.
Joke submitted by Amanda M., Springfield, Mo.
Darth Vader: I know what you’re getting for Christmas.
Luke: How do you know?
Darth Vader: I can feel your presents.
Joke submitted by Mark R., Barrington, R.I.
Comic by Scott Nickel
When asked about his job, Frosty always replies, “There’s no business like snow business.”
Joke submitted by Doug C., Gahanna, Ohio
Warped Wiseman wonders: “Does Santa Claus refer to his elves as ‘subordinate clauses’?”
Joke submitted by Dan H., Conshohocken, Pa.
Comic by Scott Nickel
Josh: Knock, knock!
Samantha: Who’s there?
Josh: Dexter.
Samantha: Dexter, who?
Josh: Dexter halls with boughs of holly.
Joke submitted by Josh B., Dublin, Ohio
Trey: What do you get when you cross a snowman and a dog?
Brandon: I give up.
Trey: Frostbite.
Joke submitted by Trey D., Ringgold, Ga.
Pedro: What does Santa say at the start of a race?
Pee Wee: I don’t know.
Pedro: “Ready, set, Ho! Ho! Ho!”
Joke submitted by Pedro the Mailburro
Comic by Daryll Collins
Josh: Why was Santa’s little helper depressed?
Mark: Dunno. Why?
Josh: Because he had low elf esteem!
Joke submitted by Dan H., Conshohocken, Pa.
Comic by Scott Nickel
A book never written: “What Did I Do Wrong THIS Year?” by Kole N. Stocking.
Joke submitted by Kole N., Amherst, N.H.
William: What did one snowman say to the other snowman?
David: What?
William: Do you smell carrots?
Joke submitted by William W., Shapleigh, Me.
Comic by Scott Nickel
Pee Wee: What did the reindeer say to the football player?
Westy: I don’t know.
Pee Wee: “Your Blitzen days are over!”
Joke submitted by Nhan P., Camp Hill, Pa.
Colton: How does a sheep say “Merry Christmas”?
Tammi: How?
Colton: “Fleece Navidad!”
Joke submitted by Colton S., Kansas City, Kan.
Comic by Scott Nickel
Do you know some funny Christmas jokes? Click here to send it to us.
Powered by WPeMatico